One of the comments on my previous post on the idea of selfmarriage and the reactions I got from friends and family after coming out with this idea, was: Congratulations on your engagement! I replied back: “Thanks, but I’m not engaged yet, because I haven’t proposed to myself officially.” So I thought that would be a good next step: the proposal.
I went for a walk (as I often do from my home) and at a very nice and quiet place with trees and a little stream of water I popped the question, after puzzling a little with the wordings; “Do you want to marry me?” or “Do I want to marry me?”
The answer was not a happy and wholehearted YES! It didn’t feel 100% right at that moment. When would you ask someone to marry you and wish to spend the rest of your lives together? I guess a strong feeling of love for this person and trust that you will grow together and excitement about the adventure. From the asking point of perspective I like myself, but unconditionally loving myself feels a bridge too far. From the receiving point of perspective, I felt pressured and fear came in. Apparently I don’t trust myself completely on this. Also the question came in: Who’s marrying whom? So who’s asking?
I decided to be ok for now with an arranged marriage status, because there is definately a part of me that is really excited about this journey and what it will bring.
Lots of Love,
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Hope to see you there!
With playful greetings,
“What does – Woesh, Boing, Pow- have to do with life?”,
was a question I posed after facilitating a Playful warming-up Energizer to a group of ex-patients and their relatives of a private clinic for addictions, burnout, depression and anxieties (www.u-center.nl).
“Everything!” was the answer of a guy in the group. We aim for a woesh, when receiving and passing on information. Sometimes we feel we want to say STOP and Boing the situation. Or we feel that we are Boingt by others who want to stop us or disagree with us. At other times we just want to get rid of something fast and Pow it away, as far as possible. Or maybe we see others far away watching us play and we want to connect to them by powing them. Another guy answered; “Well, for me it’s just FUN, and that’s good for me”.
I was amazed with the reflective skills of this group, a skill they must have learned on their tough journey and from the professional help they got while in treatment. For me delivering a Playfulness Workshop to this group was very new and I felt honored to be part of it. I’m very much looking forward to delivering two more open workshops for U-Center and trust the Power of Play to do good.
http://www.u-center.nl/workshops/serious-about-playfulness (workshop description in Dutch)
With Playful Greetings,
“Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play.” (Heraclitus)
What happens when a stranger starts laughing…
Watch this experiment at a tramstop in the Netherlands. Why not choose to be the one spreading laughter. Even a simple smile makes others feel better.
…a year full of playfulness, learning, meaning and making inspiring new connections.
With playful greetings,
Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.
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